Back to my sepia tone world

I thank the heavens for giving me such people who cares for and loves me. (Lol, responsive prayer project) HAR HAR. If I was in my evil self right now I would tell you that I've gotten the greatest birthday gift I could ever ask for. that is to NOT TAKE THE EXAMS. YES, people I got my butt saved from more pains that I have to catch up with school so in technical terms I wouldn't have to go back to school till summer classes for math (coz I did really bad this year) or if I'm a real lucky bastard, till next school year comes.

This is guilty pleasure, I could die now knowing the half of my life's burden is already gone. I mean half of my life or maybe even more. School plays a big part in my life but that's that. Personally I would love to go back to school (no kidding) even if I did have to catch up with all the lessons and back breaking that I missed out on for the last god knows how long.... haaaay

Marz is one really lucky bastard. I could see people holding a whole sausage running after me as if they want to kill me with it, I'm off crawling. I'm getting well I really am. It's just a long and slow process... hmm how many times have I said that to myself? or maybe that was my doctor coz in the back of my head it says speedy recovery / get well NOW.


Call from NY
Auntie O called this morning... dut dut dut same old same old. I'm the dull one on the phone. I would report to her that I'm getting well. Well what else would you want me to report to her? ehh.... but that's where the crazy part comes in. I was suppose to hand the phone to my dad but he's like WAY OVER WHERE. So for some reason my 'rollers' (my rolling chair) ran over my poor left foot. My 'sorta' working foot. And so I had a day with a whole new set of pain.

I just don't know how I manage to take a bath like this. Mind you I do take a bath but it's like torture time for me since wetting my foot is no walk in the park.... I want to be squeaky clean go and ask Barney's rubber ducky

Back to my little box world.
It's the end for me and my third year life. It's a sad ending for me that I don't get to end it properly with the people who I already consider as close as family. I feel like I'm a big cheat and that I don't get to take the last blow with those 'like fam' of mine.

But I was touched when peers IM-ed me telling me that I should get well soon....

go figure what we were talking about if you don't understand my language... I'm to laze to translate.

Remember the chocolates
Mum had these two pieces of Samba. I remembered this years V-day... haha White day... a day when you get to give chocolates to people.. most especially to the person you like. I reckon I did get to that. The person I like was no where to be found on that day.... thinking that I would find a substitute for that person haaay.... just give chocolates to everyone then! Why not... and indeed I did to that on that day... if you don't remember... then go visit my post on Feb 14.... that was a long one.

It's suppose to be finished airing in Taiwan on the 10th but I reckon it ended earlier somewhere in the Internet so I've finished the series and It's cute. I've learned something about this so called 'love' haha. Since I have no time for boyfriends or whatever kind of relationship but mind you I do like some 'quite' a lot...

Let me tell you. Liking someone is a nice feeling, it's good to like people but when you become selfish and start to want them for yourself that's not cool anymore. I was in the situation a long time ago. I felt like a serious loser back then.. That was the time when I liked one of my classmates back in elementary.. I remember how funny I was when I 'confessed' to him. LOL why do I even bother telling this story.

I don't mind making telly but it's getting late and I'm staying up for no a good reason. I kill myself... really I do...

So the lesson is (it's what I've reflected on)

I don't care if I really do like my EX-GAY crush still. So what if I miss him? so what if he's gay (or if I think he is?) as along as he's happy and he accepts me as a friend, I don't mind. because I'm contented. anything more than would make me feel awkward. It's probably because I'm not yet ready to commit myself into another troublesome 'relationship' I've had gone through so much. I still need time. But who cares as along as we're both 'ok' with each other.... but I don't mind kekeke... me and my wishful thinking. I'd truly be blessed then if that happens.

Because my crush thinks he's not gay but I could tell him... dude, really I know your gay! No need to say but I wanna freaking tease and taunt you that you are.... your so fun to pick on. pwahahah. I don't know if I'll get to see this lucky bastard in a long time since it seems like I'll be disappearing for a while.

I hope I really do cut ties with him. I've got nothing to give that guy.

I think I've said too much on my part for tonight. I talk too much, that's for sure.

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